PMD: Hanging in The Balance

53: AH-HEM

February 20th, 2017, 1:06 pm
WHY ARE THEY PURPLE
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WildfireK February 20th, 2017, 1:17 pm
That's quite a lot of phlegm you have there, Mr. Chatot.
VelvetRainbow February 20th, 2017, 1:27 pm
@WildfireK: Jeez, he might want to have that checked out
darvingeraldhalili (Guest) February 24th, 2017, 4:57 am
*laughs*Well at least he's okay now.
Hyperjade February 27th, 2017, 8:40 pm
Potential... This story has an excellent start to it, but the way you're managing it is practically glued to canon, with a few character species mixed up. I like the invention of a new species, I do. In fact, I really like it, and want to see how a normal version of that species moves and acts to give a contrast.

What's her face unique species main protagonist is a very interesting character. She's kind of bipolar, acting serious and philosophical at times, and at other times impulsive and funny, and easily startled. Miku is also a fun character, with a distinct personality.

The jolteon seems a bit like a reskin of loudred thus far though.

My natural bias in favor of absol really makes me want them to at least be a recurring character. I don't know if they're a cameo or not.

The way you convey shocked expressions, and the way you convey humor is probably my favorite parts of the story thus far. in the early bit, you seemed a bit rusty on dialogue writing with the zorua, and like the jolteon, their words are somewhat different but they still smell of reskinned Team Skull.

People don't generally come to view stories that are basically rewrites of canon with a twist. It's much more enticing to view a totally original story. BUT. This story has already started, and I implore you not to abandon it. The humor and storywriting for the most part is quite good, and I am interested enough by the changes made to the world that I will keep reading and I will keep enjoying it, even if I do cringe from the lack of deviation from the canon process.
VelvetRainbow February 28th, 2017, 6:30 am
@Hyperjade: thanks for the advice! Yeah, at this point its really similar to canon, and I'd be lying if I said I knew there were changes to come. I do know that it will be different from the canon story (still the same basic plot though), but I'm not changing this part up because honestly I just want chapter 2 to END. Hopefully it'll be over soon.

With the reskin deal, jolteon is actually a reskin of loudred, since for some reason I really struggled to draw him when I began the comic, but I probably can now. Might try it, who knows? The team skull duo are similar, but I do intend to change that as I redo the older pages. Unlike the jolteon, I do have more of a reason for changing them (the zoura at least) but that might not appear for a while.

Seriously though, thanks for the criticism, its the only thing that really helps me improve.